Well, this adoption process has just begun and I ask myself several times a week why I am awake between 4 & 6am? There’s no child waking me up, there’s no dog or husband waking me up, yes I could be waking up because of the RASH that I now have (went to the Dr…he relinquished the notion that I have poison ivy, and now he just thinks it’s an “environmental allergic reaction” that I have had for 6+ weeks! MORE ON this later!***) Every time I wake up I find myself thinking about various things regarding this exciting rollercoaster we are just now getting to board: how long will our wait be to receive our referral? Do we really want to specify a gender? What issues will we face even if we request a “healthy” child because of the malnutrition and other things he/she faced during their short time on this earth? How long will we have to be on this rollercoaster? And the infamous, I wonder what our child will look like…
You see, so many thoughts are just spinning between the hours of 4 and 6am. I have been spending a lot of my “spare” time looking through the NUMEROUS blogs from families who have adopted from Ethiopia, who are somewhere in the process of adoption from E, and some who are even there now meeting their child(ren). Their stories are so incredibly eye opening and I am learning so much about the process, yet I think I’m overwhelming myself a bit.
Travis and I have both been reading Russell Moore’s Adopted for Life, and it is SUCH an incredible book about adoption. We plan on giving it to several people in our lives to help them understand where we are coming from in this journey God has chosen for us. The book discusses our adoption through Christ and how the Church has been called to care for orphans in various ways. Moore utilizes his personal stories of adopting two of his boys in Russia, and gently reinforces some of the major obstacles and joys one may face on the rollercoaster of adoption, whether internationally or domestically. His use of God’s Word throughout the book is just utterly amazing; it really challenges the reader to open their hearts to helping an individual/couple going through an adoption or even for someone to begin the process of an adoption.
This excitement I have on the crazy rollercoaster of international adoption is great at times, but it is getting in the way of my sleep (which will NOT be good in the long run!) <*insert my ever-elusive faith*> I’ve been trying to utilize my wide-eyed state from 4-6 to either read and/or pray to my Heavenly Father. My faith is weak, and I must continue working on my trust and knowing that my God has me in the palm of His hand. When I cry out like David did in the Psalms, I must realize God is listening to my cries and He will answer them in His time.
***Oh yes, about this rash…(granted, I never thought I’d use this avenue to share about my ailments, but I’m just so frustrated that I must share…) So about 6 weeks ago we began thinking that I had come into contact with poison oak/ivy, but had NO idea where or how. After dealing with a growing issue on my leg, I surrendered and went to my family Dr. He prescribed a “strong” steroid cream and told me to use it once a day. Later that night (without using the cream because the pharmacy didn’t have it in stock), I began developing spots ALL OVER, very very itchy spots…I woke up at 3am after taking several Benadryl (which KNOCK me out, usually) and demanded we go to the ER because I couldn’t stand the itching. They believed it was poison oak/ivy as well, and gave me two weeks’ worth of Prednisone/oral steroid and a nice shot. In the mean time I am trying A LOT of different methods for anti-itching…to no avail. Fast forward three weeks and I still have itchy spots on my legs, arms, chest, and hips, therefore I scheduled another Dr. visit (I tried to get into a dermatologist: one isn’t taking new patients and another one couldn’t get me in until Oct 15th). Here I received another shot and a prescription for a MOISTURIZER cream, and told to come back in two weeks to see if I need a referral to a dermatologist. WHAT?!?!?! Again…weird stuff happens to me and my doctor takes his good ol’ time figuring things out…Can you tell I’m frustrated? I’ve been saying this entire “adventure” itching needs to become the next torture technique, I would tell anyone ANYTHING to get rid of this itching!